Who am I

I've been thinking of the time when to me I was actually happy! The time when certain stuff didn't make me mad. I've been looking in the mirror lately thinking where is that girl? And what have you done with her. The time where I could actually be me without making someone mad. And when I could get my nails, hair, and waxing done and out of the way, without pulling an arm and a leg.Lets face it I like to feel pretty. I've been feeling bitter and unhappy for a while now and I really honestly sick of it. I would like to be happy again. I would like to be me without hiding my true self because it makes people mad or offended. I used to smile! Why cant I now?

I just don't feel like me! I feel gross, I don't even attempt to put on makeup anymore because why bother? It could be because the women that lives 5 feet away from me gets everything that she wants without having to beg! Shoes, Makeup, Jewelry, nails, pedicures, $200 gift cards for massages, purses, trips to ireland. While I sit here and feel like a hobo. I feel like I deserve something, I work My butt off for nothing and it really makes me mad. But if I say anything Im the bad guy. I don't like feeling downgraded, maintaining myself is important to me!